Does this feel familiar?
You’re yawning on the sofa, then the moment your head hits the pillow your brain switches on.
You wake at 3am almost every night, and you know the exact shape of the shadow on your ceiling.
You’ve started doing the maths: ‘if I fall asleep now, I’ll get four and a half hours.’
You’ve tried the magnesium, the lavender spray and the sleep app, and you’re still awake.
What might be going on
Sleep needs your body to feel safe enough to switch off. When stress hormones stay high into the evening, your body stays alert even though you’re exhausted. That’s the ‘tired but wired’ feeling.
Night waking can also come from hormones, especially around perimenopause, from pain, alcohol, caffeine late in the day, or simply from a habit your brain has learnt. Worrying about not sleeping then becomes its own reason to stay awake.
What helps depends on what’s driving it. Calming your nervous system, changing evening habits and working with anxious thoughts all play a part, and many people need a mix.
One small thing. Just for today.
If you’ve been awake for more than 20 minutes, get up, keep the lights low and do something calm until you feel sleepy. Then go back to bed.
Let’s untangle a few assumptions
Support can look different
A little perspective
The NHS describes insomnia lasting three months or longer as long-term insomnia. NICE recommends cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia, known as CBT-I, as a first treatment, ahead of sleeping tablets.
Questions you might be asking
When to get medical help
See your GP if poor sleep has lasted more than a few weeks, is affecting your daytime life, or comes with loud snoring or gasping, which can be a sign of sleep apnoea. Your GP can also refer you for CBT for insomnia.
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